Thursday, 2 May 2019

I'm still here



Mate I’m actually writing a blog post. It’s a completely different feeling cos I’m doing this on my phone. Sitting at my desk with a cup of tea and bags of time and inspiration hasn’t really been a thing since Mila was born and I relish the opportunity to lay down...

 So here I am, tapping away on my little iPhone screen spelling almost everything wrong as I’m not used to typing so much on this tiny keyboard. I’m more of a voicenote or a 'few words on whatsapp' kind of girl. The temptation to add emojis is high, I admit. 

photo-jenn-ic-blog-jennifrost-mum-life


So I haven't blogged in a while. I’ll put that partly down to becoming a mum of two but also because I’ve just not been feeling it. To be honest I started to think I didn’t 'fit the mould' as a blogger- especially a beauty blogger. Although I wear makeup everyday I don't buy half as much  as I used to- which is probably a good thing. I felt out of the loop.

I love taking pictures and sharing my thoughts so instagram has been my go to over the last few months but I don't want to forget my, as we call it 'little place on the internet'. After all, if insta went away so would my pictures and those thoughts and rambles that go with each post.

 And I have a lot of thoughts. 
The last month especially has had my mind wandering and racing like a curious sniffer dog on speed.

Maybe I’ll go into that in more detail at some point. Maybe.

I realised that while I’m definitely not your stereotypical blogger I can still blog. Life would be boring if we were all the same and there’s so many fantastic beauty blogs out there doing their thing bigger and better than I ever could. 
When I felt like giving it all up I realised that’s what old Jenn would do. Now I tackle things head on when they are important to me. Who cares if I'm more OTT than OOTD and if I have no clue where my nearest flower wall is?!

I’ve been writing for years, what started off as ranting about boys turned into sharing my love of beauty products. Then I liked to document my life a bit, share my thoughts on what was going on. I'd talk about my mental health, not only get some understanding for others but for myself. Writing is cathartic like that.

When I’m not quite sure what to do I write, it's my go-to when I feel a bit lost. I hadn't quite realised how far that goes back until I found some old notebooks the other day.

 I have a lot of notebooks. 
Some completely full, some untouched. 
Some had an account of each day that year, others I wouldn’t pick up for months but when I eventually did I would write for pages just to get things out. I don't think I'd ever looked back and read them but it’s interesting to see how I’ve changed over the years. Things that bothered me back then are tiny drops in the ocean now. People that mattered years ago are now distant memories, some are closer to me know than ever.   If You’ve been in my life in some way or another you can guarantee I've written about you at some point in some shape or form. Does that sound creepy? Hey, I'm just being honest.

I like getting my thoughts out, and sometimes sharing those thoughts helps people. Something as simple as finding a brightening shampoo that actually works, or a self cleaning make-up brush (we can all dream); I'd tell my bestie about it so why not you guys? 
Then there's sharing the personal stuff which I've toyed with over the years. In many ways I'm a very open book but in others I keep my cards extremely  close to my chest. Maybe some stuff will remain private, some might be a bit cryptic but it can be good to take a leaf out of the the Mean Girls (burn) book and 'let it out honey'. Who knows, it might even help someone else who is going through something similar. The internet has the power to feel like such a lonely place, like you're a teenie tiny fish in a huge pond, but also it can bring the most distant people together. 

This Mum stuff in particular comes with a free gift in the form of a whirlwind of emotions. So many worries and so so many questions. That thrown in with every day living and niggles of self doubt that always creep in when least expected - well I need an outlet for it all somewhere.  


So this little ramble is my kind-of jumping off point, and where I jump to I don't quite know yet but I enjoy the idea of finding out. I just know I’m not quite done yet. 







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